Craving, I supposed...
Last night, I was sleeping on my left side leaning against the bed with my face facing the left, left leg straight, inner side of my right leg on top of my comforter, forming a 'h' shape from up view. It's really hard having a cousin around but not having to talk to him. I really wanted him to send me off to the airport but, I knew he's not gonna do that. He's not good in giving surprise and I wouldn't expect that from him. Waking up early in the morning, giving me a cousin-hug, watching me leave and sending me off will not happen, I know. BUT, last night, he was sitting next to me on my bed, telling me something, giving me a hug after that. I was very happy and when I tried to respond by touching him, I thought I felt him but I didn't. Out of sudden, I realized I can open my eyes. It was just a dream. I wanted too much from him. Don't get me wrong, we're just cousins.. Please don't think that I'm gay or something, I'm not. Sigh... I wonder when will we be talking to each other again like nothing has ever happened...
P/S : =(
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